I was invited to do some previewing of excessively expensive stuff at The Boat Show in Cape Town courtesy of Andrew at Bourne2Ride. You would have seen Andrew in the Sunday paper, something like this:

Go go go!

Yeah! That’s pretty sick. I was nowhere near getting into the water, not a chance. That’s why I write and he wakeboards. I’ll slip a disc doing something like that.

Anyway being a boat show, you’d expect boats, engines, GPS systems, jet ski’s and all that. But then, wait, what is that? Is that something out of the ordinary, why is this at the boat show?

Not clear so let’s zoom in

Ooooooooh-kayyyyyy!

All I have to say is “Interesting”

It’s always quite amusing, seeing the brass penis on the door to the mens at Moyo at Spier.

Small things…for small minds.

Is small the right word to use?

Hey guys and girls

Just a quick note, if I haven’t replied to your e-mails…my apologies. E-mails direct to my address will be answered promptly, but with the contact form on the bottom of the website, I have slipped up! Those e-mails go to a separate address mainly due to spam reasons. And I was not checking the spam box! But I have replied to all your e-mails this morning, I do hope none were lost.

For contacting me you can simply click here.

Great! Seriously I’m available all the time. Drop me a line. Send me things. Photos. Products. I’m like a wishing well for gifts. Or something like that. Catch you later!

Just a current look at the Green Point Stadium. The majority of you won’t know why this is being built, but I’m on the cutting edge of breaking news!

22 September 2009 progress, nice! Click here for high resolution

South Africa just won the bid to host a World Cup, where guys will be playing soccer! Apparently they just kick a ball around, and then try and get that ball go into a net. It sounds very intriguing. I knew you’d love that.

There are quite a lot of photos on the City Of Cape Town website, just click here to check the rest.

(Thanks Rashiq)

You by now will know of Tucker Max, and there really is no need to go into detail. Now as you also know, he has managed to make himself famous, and get himself all famous by being a dick, awesome!

Goes to show, all that they teach you in school is wrong.

So Tuckers movie is called I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell and I haven’t seen it because it’s not here yet, but when it comes to SA you know I’ll watch it! Just to sort of let you slip into the Tucker Max character, let’s check out two facts from the website:

Rad! And you say I’m bad, whaaaaaaat?!

Check out the I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell website over here.

I thought you’d enjoy that.

I watched the trailer, and I won’t lie, it looks a bit kak! But I am still trying to recover from how awesome The Hangover was.

I first heard of GirlzE from Nash and to be honest, didn’t take too much notice. (I have no idea why, kicking myself)

Until I unwittingly arrived at Club 91 in Claremont and stumbled into the GirlzE lingerie show. Honestly? It’s the hottest thing I’ve seen all year.

The girls are so incredibly beautiful, it is hard to compose yourself around them. They literally just attract crowds because they are so damn gorgeous!

So I received an invite on Facebook to the GirlzE Glamour Party, and you need to e-mail them and tell them why you should be on the list to attend the party. I like them mean!

Makes taming them a greater challenge…

Anyway, here is what it has to say:

On Friday 2 October, NawtyMedia in association with GirlzE present a night of glamorous indulgence at The Butterfly Studio. This gorgeous photographic studio has housed thousands of the hottest photo shoots in Cape Town and has played home to some of the hottest Fashion industry parties in the Mother City.

On this night we kit out the place to create the ultimate party playpen for your entertainment pleasure. Expect smoking hot DJ’s playing the finest blend of Electronic music for your listening pleasure, complimentary sushi, delectable cocktails on arrival and more, leading up to one seriously hot fashion show courtesy of the GirlzE girls, where we will showcase sensational lingerie, swimwear and kinky costumes.

Expect a night of exclusivity, glamour, titillating (Ha ha they said tit — Sean) fun and style. To get onto the very exclusive VIP guestlist, drop one of the Admins and tell us why you should be on it.

This is the type of event that you as a human need to attend. It’s not one of those optional things, you need to try get on the list for it.  Click here for the Facebook event, where you can get the low down.

In my pants.

So as is standard on Twitter, everyone is now suddenly using # before anything they say. I know it’s got some sort of technical meaning, but most people just use it to follow the leader because everyone is doing it.

#vidae

#ferrarri

#earthdance

I’ve got one

#SHUTUP

There we go. Anyway, in the trending topics #iamsinglebecause came up and naturally I had to reply here:

This obviously refers to Marisa Miller tucking into some pies recently and looking hideos and bloated:

She had the indecency to use my bath

But then check these two absolute pearls, one after another, crash boom bang!

Right, moving on, there is absolutely nothing for you to see here.

What? Hey I didn’t say it this time, she said it herself!

Freaks.

Ster Kinekor are screening Michael Jackson’s ‘This Is It’ as a farewell to one of the greatest singers and entertainers the planet has ever seen. This includes clips from his final rehearsals for his comeback tour that never happened. This Is It is limited and will only run for two weeks, with a special 3am premier on Wednesday 28 October at the following cinemas:

• Fourways

• Sterland in Pretoria

• Gateway Commercial in Durban

• Cavendish Commercial in Cape Town (Us! Us!)

The reason for the 3am start is that it is part of a simultaneous worldwide screening to fans, and will include a live link to Los Angeles. Tickets went on sale today, and tickets for the 3am premiere cost R200 per ticket and this includes breakfast and a Michael Jackson related gift (If you are an Edgars or Discovery cold holder, you will pay R150)

Simply click here to book tickets to the regular screening of Michael Jackson’s This Is It.

And click here to book tickets to the special 3am screening.

This is definitely something very worthwhile watching.

When do you cross the line? For some it’s alcohol, some drugs.

Then for the really crazy bastards, it’s hair products. I got lost in my house earlier and realised the only reason I was lost was because I had so many damn hair products to sift through!

Look, I wouldn’t call it an addiction, but something is going on. I mean it’s not exactly like I have over R2000 worth of hair products right there! That would be crazy.

*Calculates in mind*

Wait…I do…is this bad?

Do we need help? Has one addiction been replaced by another?

“Not that I need all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious hair product collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can”

Look, the main point is that I look fabulous when I leave Mission Control so that if you see me in the street you are blown away by my presence. But seriously though, it’s not an addiction.

Don’t look at me funny.

What?

With summer waking me up every morning before my threesome fantasy with two 27 year old’s is over, one needs to start thinking of ways to actually attract the opposite sex, instead of just dreaming about them. While money is a way of attracting the opposite sex, not everyone has money. While natural charm is said to work (Don’t ask me), I have no idea how to play this card. The only charm I have is the little Thai boy in my cabana hut at the pool in the garden, holding a banana leaf so that he can cool The Sean down when the summer rays get too much and the Piz Buin SPF2 bronzing oil is no longer protecting my gorgeous, supple hide.

What we need is some old school attraction techniques, like those they use in the animal kingdom. Where they use scent to attract and punish the opposite sex into being their sex slaves. While we don’t endorse sex slaves at SLXS, we do in a small way promote child labour, because imagine if there were no child labour? My Nike’s would cost like R4000 PER SHOE!

While some of you may commonly link scent with roofies, these are completely different things. Attracting someone and taking advantage of them while they sleep are completely different things! And just because what you make them drink is legal, doesn’t make it right! Cough…eye drops…cough…

Wait a second, did I just write what you have just read? I can for a fact not recall what I meant back there, so let’s start again you sexy devils.

Fragrances…Sean tunes his mind in and onto the right channel. Aaaaaah! There we are.

I was at Cavendish earlier trying to score some crack from those rubbish kids at McDonalds…tra la la lee la.

Then I went into the fragrance store, Truworths or something and tried out two awesome fragrances! One is unisex and the other is for men.

The first one is so damn gorgeous I wanted to eat it and it is going to be insane for summer. It’s CK One Summer, let’s have a look at that bad boy:

Now there is no point in me explaining the fragrance, but I like it and I spritzed some of the tester on today. It’s so damn good. The fragrance notes are: Mint, Cucumber, Lemon, Bergamot, Green Apple, Lotus, Rosemary, Rum, Woods, Sea Moss, Sandalwood. Sick, dude.

Before we go on, just a quick little note on fragrances:

• Spray it on the wrists (Another tip I once read in GQ, from a top female perfume maker “Spray it anywhere you’d get kissed” — Emptied a bottle into my pants) But a really good tip is to spray it on the wrist, and on the neck, and that’s all you need. Don’t rub the fragrance vigorously, as this can damage it’s scent. Just let it air dry naturally.

• Don’t buy a fragrance based on spraying it on a test card. It develops differently on everyone and just because it smells good on a friend of yours, doesn’t make it suitable for you.

• Fragrances will last different times on different people. Dry skin may not carry a scent as well (For dry skin, try fish oil supplements)

• Don’t over spray. You don’t want to kill people with your scent, it should rather be noticeable by other people within talking distance of you. Your scent shouldn’t overpower the room, unless you’re a news anchor and you’re wearing sex panther.

• Don’t test too many fragrances in one day. Take your time, spread the testing over a week or two, just testing two a day. Obviously don’t spray one on top of the other, gimp.

Those are the main tips for being successfully sexual.

The other absolute classic is Aqua Di Gio by Giorgio Armani.

To be honest, I don’t even remember doing this campaign

This is one of my all time favourites and I’ve often seduced myself with it. It is actually so damn good and I never get tired of it. Give it a try, you will love it. Fresh and awesome, if it has graced thine hide, it shall grace yours very well too. Here is a description of it from Amazon.com:

A resolutely masculine fragrance born from the sea, the sun, the earth, and the breeze of a Mediterranean island. Transparent, aromatic, and woody in nature Aqua Di Gio Pour Homme is a contemporary expression of masculinity, in an aura of marine notes, fruits, herbs, and woods. Fragrance notes: citrus notes, rosemary spiciness, jasmine, hint of wood and ocean breezes. Recommended use: casual.

This is very good news in the fight to come right!

Two of my top fragrances for this summer.

There is that other one for woman that is insane, Poison something or other? Hypnotic Poison? It’s the one the American co-anchor wears…

Names please darling.