Chris De Burgh touring South Africa

Chris De Burgh is set to tour South Africa later this year, with performances in Durban, Johannesburg and Cape Town!

Wickie…wickie…wickie woo!

That’s pretty sick if you ask me.

Personally, one of my favourite things about Chris De Burgh is actually that my mate Jezza always, without fail, sings along to “Lady in red” and changes it to “Lady in red…is giving me head”

Crisis, it’s actually hilarious! Everytime he does it I laugh, granted my brain is smaller than most peoples and the little things are funny, and I hardly use any of my brainpower because it usually hurts too much.

Our Crizzly Bear, hot daughter Rosanna and his wife

Anyway the schedule for the Chris De Burgh South Africa tour is as follows:

Johannesburg — Big Top Arena, Carnival City Casino and Entertainment World on Saturday 14 November 2009

Durban — Indoor Arena, International Convention Centre, Tuesday 17 November 2009

Cape Town — Kirstenbosch Gardens, Thursday 19 November 2009

The basic idea is that, if you want to come right, you need to be at the Chris De Burgh concert. Your girlfriend/wife/mistress/Thai whipping boy/ gimp suit child/ midget/ donkey/ rice paddy worker/ wheat farmer/ corn cobber will go all out to satisfy you afterwards because Chris De Burgh…he make…he make…he make you so horny.

Me so horny…me, me so horny. Well that’s what that Asian waitress was telling us last week, but then again she has been sneaking some saki (Spelling? Sucky?) and was pretty lapsakdooi. Am I right guys? Yeah, she was pretty lapsakdooi!

So that’s it, if you’re in Cape Town on the 19th of November 2009, then Catch Chris De Burgh. You’ll get action, so it’s a good deal. And to those of you in the know you will remember that Chris De Burgh’s daughter, Rosanna Davison, won the Miss World Title in 2003. I’d tap that. If Blake Lively and Leighton Meester weren’t after me.

Sean Lloyd

Editor