I’m reading a fascinating book at the moment called ‘Born To Run’ and it’s about a hidden tribe of super runners called the Tarahumara, and it’s mind blowing. Devoid of modern technology and sports equipment, these people are the best runners on the planet. It’s an interesting look into how we’re affected by marketing and advertising, brands telling us to wear these shoes, and monitor our heart rate, and take this energy sachet and this recovery shake. I’ve long believed you don’t need any of that, and I was fascinated by a mate of mine that did a 3:30 Argus on Sunday having only done 200km in training. It’s phenomenal what our bodies can do, and how our minds limit our bodies based often on what marketing has us believe. We think compression socks will help us, and really what they do is help us mentally. Every bit of equipment we as athletes use is basically based on the placebo effect. Sure, a lightweight bike does help, but how is it possible that non professional cyclists, who have full time jobs, and ride sub standard bikes, can easily do close to 3 hour times on the Argus?

And how can one of the Tarahumara run 435 miles in around 48 hours, with no scientific diet, and absolutely no modern day running equipment? Check it out:

That is phenomenal.

So a South African team have never stood on that top step of the podium, and two of South Africas most accomplished cyclists, David George and Kevin Evans are training impossibly hard to change that. Here’s their story:

No doubt the boys are going to take the win this year, good luck to them!

I’m quite excited to see this documentary, following none other than Cape Town’s Ryan Sandes, here is the trailer for it:

Awesome, awesome stuff.

It kind of makes you want to just go roaming the planet with no particular direction, to experience what’s really out there beyond this stupid digital world we live in. We see the destruction of the earth, from our computers. We try fix the destruction of the earth, from our computers.

We see the beauty of the earth, from our computers. We talk about the beauty of the earth, after seeing it on websites such as Bostons Big Picture.

But not many of us get to be out there experiencing all the extremes the planet has to throw at us. There is something beautiful about being out there on your own, with no other worries other than survival, life at it’s purest. Raw. I think all athletes are just looking for that, some silence from the crazy world. That’s why they wake up early and go running and cycling after work, just to allow some quiet time into their lives. We all need it, and athletes know the power of it.

I really can’t wait to see what the full Wandering Fever is going to look like, I’ll let you know.

So I ran into Wellness Warehouse the other day with a bloody steak in my hand, shouting ‘I NEED A COKE TO WASH THIS DOWN WITH!!’

It always freaks the fruitivores out. Or whatever they are.

And I saw some sort of bottled water, with a message saying ‘Love’ or something on the bottle, I quickly read it and it said something about ‘Words affect water’

I’d like to think I’m in touch with the universe and whatever (Hout Bay), but this is just…pushing it a bit? So I tried to find something similar online, and came across ‘Emo Water’ Honestly?!

Well apparently so, according to the website:

“EMO-H2O is a new bottled water based on the research of doctors, materials scientists and University researchers around the globe. This research shows how water is affected when labeled with a positive word. Scientist Rustom Roy and others have made incredible discoveries about the H2 to O bond being changed and stabilized and how water crystallizes beautifully after being exposed to positive words. Dr. Masaru Emoto, as seen in the award winning documentary “What the Bleep do we Know” has photographed the changes that occur after positive or negative words were put on water.”

So that’s what we’re currently dealing with in the world. Water can essentially now read the words on bottles, and take on this emotion and be all happy and stuff.

As if bottling water and making it a commodity were not bad enough, we’ll now be charging a premium on water because it’s ‘happy’. Water has already been made into a commodity by giants like Coca Cola, who charge us ridiculous prices for something we should all have access to at virtually no cost. It’s one of the basic necessities of life.

And I thought the iPad was cool…now we have reading water? I never thought I’d see the day!

Right now, you don’t look as good as you should because you’re probably not drinking two litres of water a day. And buying bottled water is killing the planet man!

So the solution? Buy a water filter from H20 that is fitted at the sink, and then fill the two litre bottles up for this water dispenser, so you have to finish a bottle a day. This isn’t a water cooler or filter, merely a dispenser, but let’s be honest this will look SICK on your desk!

YES PLEASE!

It let’s people know that, yes, you can party. And yes, you have a child like side to you. But you’re still here to tear the business world apart!

The best part? It’s only R150, and it’ll make sure that you get your two litres a day.

Click here to buy it.

Go and get it you hero.

Is this what we call it now?

Interesting.

Photo courtesy of RacingThePlanet and Zandy Mangold

So you all know the story and I don’t need to tell you what he’s just won this week, but I will.

At the moment, Ryan Sandes is the best ultra distance runner on the planet. He is the only person in history to run and win all four races of the 4 Desert Series. Actually since I started following his progress after reading about him in GQ, he has basically won everything, take that Dean Karnazes!

Catch more photos and stories on his website over at RyanSandes.com

Well done Ryan, you’re doing SA proud.

So we all know they like to klap some eye drops in the birds drinks…you know…to make things easier for them. It’s hard to impress a dolly at ‘The Hat’ when all you can tune is like gym and pec decks and lats and like protein bru.

But when they not klapping the Eye Gene in the birds drinks, they need to see themselves.

Not only are the ‘roids making their peckers smaller, they’re also shrinking their eyes or something so they need contact lenses. But what’s the point, when their contact lens solution is robbing them of their soul, their personality, their life force…PROTEIN!

Jussus my bru, how are the okes surviving now that these Chinas are removing their protein?

Un-bee-lievable!

Because I know you’re a drunk and disorderly, chaotic and rowdy bunch, I thought you’d like to hammer some branners (Spelling? Who cares?) and watch South Africa pummel New Zealand this weekend at 5pm on Saturday. I’m not sure if tickets to this are sold out, but I’m pretty sure they are. And also, you’re in Cape Town, and the match is not. But this is all cool, I found a package at SA Sport Travel that has flights, tickets and accommodation, so you now have a plan, Japan! Whatever Trevor!

Check it uit:

South Africa take on New Zealand this Saturday 21 August in the Tri Nations taking place at FNB Stadium in Soweto. SA Sport Travel have a limited number of packages available for this clash of the titans. The package itinerary is as follows:

• Two nights’ accommodation at the City Lodge Fourways.

• Breakfast on Saturday and Sunday at the hotel

• Flights

• Meet and Greet at Johannesburg International

• Return transfers from the airport to the hotel

• Main Grandstand Ticket to the rugby test

• Transfers to the match and return

City Lodge Fourways

Situated in close proximity to Sandton City and across the way from Montecasino, the hotel is easily accessible to all the main feeder motorways with nearby restaurants and shops.
A shuttle bus service is available for the short 15 minute trip to and from Sandton Centre at a nominal fee. A mini gym, pool and meeting room are also available at the hotel.

I’m not sure how many spaces are available still, but I read in the e-mail that they are limited, and the game is on Saturday, so round up the troops!

Click here if you’re interested.

Jeez Louise I’ve got an awesome memory! I was thinking back to my seedy youth where women paid me for pleasure (I was 7 — but MASSIVE) and back in the day people always asked ‘Sean, how did you become a lady slayer extraordinaire?’

Look, most of it is in your jeans, mine were slim cut Kleins that showed off a massive, pulsating member.

I also remember being in ridiculous shape because I always managed to watch Bodies In Motion with Gilad! Crisis you will obviously remember Gilad, especially the girls because everyone wanted a piece of the G-Master. It was back in the days where we believed advertising and infomercials worked, where there was no internet and cellphones. It was back in the day when life was simpler. I mean, technology claims to make our lives simpler but they’re way more complicated, but thankfully prescription medication now takes care of the stress. Ha ha! Hmmmmm…ooooh shiny!

Candy bars!

For a little old school inspiration today, let’s have a look at the original Greek God, the personal trainer, the lady slayer, the ho slapper, the pimp hand, left disco dancing ghetto gym bunny, Gilad Janklowicz!

Oh my GOD! How was that?!

Ladies, I imagine you were seeing Gilad there doing those little dips and you were thinking of being there beneath him, him giving you a good old tea bag! With those tight buns of his dripping sweat onto your forehead. Desire!

Good grief I’m getting carried away. But seeing as though it is winter I may actually post more of his videos, so as to keep those thunder thighs in check.

Such is my love for all of you.

Floyd Landis: A sad individual

I was quite surprised that Lance has been implicated in doping again…I mean I thought we were over this a while ago. Floyd Landis has admitted to doping throughout his career and has said that Lance has also been opening a can of the Dopetizer.

Which to be honest, I don’t believe. As always! Maybe I want to believe.

I really do. Maybe I want to believe in good things in a world where we don’t believe anymore. Maybe for once I just want to think that someone did something without cheating. In a world where everyone is looking for an easy way to the top, maybe I want to believe that hard, honest work gets people to the top. I’ve always believed in cycling as the worlds greatest sport, and I wrote a piece nearly three years ago entitled “Tour De France — Why It’s Still The Greatest Race On Earth” (HERE)

Maybe for once I don’t want to question something, because there really is no question there. Maybe for once, all of us should believe. Like when we were kids, we just believed. We believed anything could happen. And the people who believe are still the worlds most successful people. No one got anywhere by not believing.

People age and stop believing and that’s why you must be like me…and be Peter Pan!

Lance has way too much to lose if he is caught doping. He is one of the most tested athletes in the world, and unless he is paying the people who make the systems that test the drugs, or working at the highest levels with the drug makers (While still training and running his Livestrong Foundation), then I really cannot believe that he has ever doped.

If you’re going to dope through 7 Tours De France and not get caught, well then you’re Houdini! I just really for once want to believe in something good and awesome, and Lance Armstrong has always been that belief. I’m sick of having to question everything in the world, I just want to believe in something just because it is amazing and good.

And for Floyd Landis to come out and say that Lance has used drugs is just a sign of a weak athlete, a loser who could never make it either due to his genetic make up or just because he was not willing to work as hard. At the level that those athletes are at, they all training as much as each other. It’s part genetics, part hard work and part science. Lance brought a new science to the sport. He perfected his equipment in wind tunnels, he trained in the snow, he trained while athletes like David Millar were our partying and drinking vodka. It’s that extra dedication that gives them those small extra percentages of advantage, and that’s what wins tours.

That’s what wins over fans across the world.

That’s what makes heroes.

That’s what makes Lance Armstrong.

And that’s what makes me believe.

And until we have mature (i.e not wanky ex drug abusing cyclists who initially lied about their drug use) people proving otherwise with absolute conclusive evidence, then I’ll remain a believer.

Because we need more of those in the world.

For Lances take on this, read THIS ARTICLE on Livestrong.com…handled nicely by Lance, loving it.

So Sportograf were at the Cape Epic and they took some sick photos:

Pap wiel

Click here for the gallery.

I’m pretty sure there is a bounty out there to in fact catch me not chilling. I think there is probably a huge amount of money on offer for the person that catches me doing anything remotely productive! You actually may as well give up now because there is no chance that you will see me crunching numbers or wearing a suit.

I decided to hurt the Two Oceans Half Marathon on Saturday by watching it instead of running it, which is basically the only way to do it. Instead of actually standing there (Standing wastes energy — I love nature too much to waste energy!), we just pulled the couch out the mansion and chilled! Sam Paddock caught me good:

The only problem was that we didn’t think to pull a spotlight out, because it was quite dark when the runners came past and there were so many hot birds running! Another reason why I should join a Constantia running club. Seriously, so many hotties run that running should feature more on my list of things to watch.

Between running and wedding crashing, I’ll be surrounded by more women than oxygen, a monumental feat. I also enjoy the fact that Nike make such great womens running gear, with fantastic cuts. Saturday was like a model casting on front of the house, just with some sweaty older dudes blurring out my rad view from time to time.

I did thoroughly enjoy it though, and I am quite tired from the whole thing. Which is why I’m going to take this week to myself, and we’ll also surely be takin g the Range Rover for s spin. Maybe we’ll also finally get our first video done. I’m not sure if I’ll have time, what with my schedule being so hectic.

MILF Hunt at Vida, drive the Range, watch Top Gear, watch Jonathan Ross, write an article…There is surely no way I can fit any more activities into this action packed week.