All photos courtesy of the Barnet Fair page on Facebook

Now there were a whole lot of things going through my mind before I went through. A small part of me wanted it to be a rubbish experience, only so I could say ‘This place is the pits!!’ Because Steven Pitt owns it. Wow, that would have been incredibly lame of me, but the thought ran through my head and I had to tell you about that. Right, moving swiftly along.

Secondly, I hoped that I would leave my place in Blue Downs, with my teeth missing, and a bottle of meths/anti-freeze in one hand. That way I could have entitled this post ‘I got my hair did’ Again, lame. And again, the thought ran through my head and I had to tell you.

I shot up a quick double espresso before going through, jumped in the rally car and hammered through to town with Queen banging through the system.

I cruised past Shortmarket Street and kept a beady eye out for the car guard, driving slowly until his attention was on someone else. I saw him turn away from me and swung my car violently into the parking space on the side of the road, jumped out the car, locked it and started hurdling over the guard rails like a was a damn cocaine addicted ad exec running through the office to catch a quick one with the hot new secretary. Clearly I’m not as Usain Bolt as I think I am in my head, and the car guard caught me and made me pay R13.50.

So yeah, interesting experience on the arrival. I then rolled past &Union, past that weird God’s Army store (Whatever that is) and into Barnet Fair.

Welcome to Barnet Fair

Well I’ll be damned. It’s a very small place, unless you’re a bit of a charna, because then no place is big enough for you. Or your ego. On the one hand I was really excited to be getting the closest shave of my life with a straight razor. Now it’s not the old old school razor they use, rather Minora type blades that fit into a cut throat sort of device. So they can dispose of the blades and it’s no doubt more hygienic. What with all the HIV rolling around and all.

Oh and the other thing, you kick back with an &Union beer. I’m quite a lightweight, because I knocked it down and the next thing I was talking all sorts of rubbish, because I was in fact feeling quite pissed.

So the thing is, I’m not one of those dak Chinas who likes to like, klap gym and beers and like, swing dick with the boychies in the change room. But I still don’t want to come across as weak, especially when I’m in a place that is serving me beer and putting a blade to my throat. So when I was asked (By Naomi if I’m correct?) if I had sensitive skin (So that she could use the correct products), I OBVIOUSLY said no. Little did they know I’ve been using shaving cream with aloe in it for years, following this up with an organic aftershave balm. And that’s not to mention that I quite often just give my stubble a trim with a beard trimmer, so my skin hardly gets touched.

Well I tell you what, I almost immediately regretted saying that, because I thought I was going to have razor burn from hell after what my skin was about to go through. But I didn’t. All I can say is…Barnet Fair know how to shave, and they don’t skimp on products.

With an &Union in my hand, I was all full on confidence. Nothing like the taste of freshly brewed courage! First off, my face was lathered with the most luxurious shave cream, old school with a brush. They were using the Edwin Jagger range and let me tell you, that stuff is the business. The little bit of stubble I had (Probably at least a months growth, so 2mm) was scraped off with the straight blade.

After that, I was checked for any rough spots, and those were quickly whisked off with the straight blade. I thought ‘Awesome, that didn’t hurt a bit’

Then came more lather. And the Mach3. Against the grain.

Now I’ve heard horror stories about shaving against the grain, about blood and ingrowns and all sorts of terrible things happening to sensitive kids like me. So my whole face is shaved, against the grain, with a Mach3. Awesome, I’m done!

No no! Another lather with the brush, and another shave…against the grain! I was petrified that my face was going to fall off from all this shaving, but…well nothing happened.

No razor burn, no redness, and no ingrown hairs, even days after the shave. Quite simply, it was the best, and closest shave I have ever had. Everytime I shave at home, my skin gets dry and I never get it close enough for it to look as if I’ve never grown a facial hair. But Barnet Fair shaved me so close, that my skin looked brand new. I couldn’t quite understand why my skin was so soft and smooth afterwards, as shaving is normally never kind to my skin. But with the right products and a skilled hand, Barnet Fair give you a close shave, with no irritation and dryness.

Oh and I nearly forgot about the haircut that came with it! Let’s just say I was looking awesome afterwards. It wasn’t cut too short, just right. My hair is quite straight forward to cut, and I was stoked with what it looked like afterwards. I looked quite rad (If I must say so myself) The confidence that comes from having a haircut and a shave is amazing. I almost felt confident enough to hit the gym afterwards with the okes. Only joking, but I was keen to hit the bar.

So head on down and get your shave on, and girls, this is an awesome gift for your man.

You can check Barnet Fair out at:

93 Bree Street, Cape Town.

Stroll over to &Union afterwards and sink a 2nd, 3rd, 4th beer…

Click here for their website.