Coca-Cola relaunch Fresca and wife beating

I’m a massive movie fan because I love the thought of fantasy, and the way movies take you out of your world and transport you into some other parallel universe, even if it’s just for two hours. I’m watching War Of The Worlds as I speak, and I’m pretending to be living basically under a massive highway, like Tom Cruise in the movie, it’s so sick!

So for this post I’m going to pretend I’m a loser with nothing better to do than try and find bad associations to a name that a brand have given a product. All aboard?

Let’s go!

I think it’s pretty shocking that Coca Cola have launched a new ‘carbonated energy soft drink’ called “Beat” I bought a can earlier and it tastes like Fresca (When it was around) It either tastes like that, or a bit like a Sprite sort of vibe. I just think the choice of name was highly insensitive, because beat can be attributed to many things.

beat soft drink

Beat glamourises wife beating and baby seal clubbing

Firstly it could refer to wanking, and to have people drink your wank is not only crude, but it’s not funny in the slightest, even if it is a drink for the younger cocaine riddled market.

Secondly, Beat OBVIOUSLY refers to men beating their wives. So they are selling a drink called “beat your wife” and I think this needs to be taken before the Human Rights Commission. In Afrikaans this drink is called “Moer jou wife”

I remember I used to wear my vest and call it a wife beater, only because my arms are so massive.But when someone told me that it’s not right to beat my wife, I stopped. And I also took to calling my wife beater a “vest”

I therefore think that it’s highly irresponsible for a reputable brand such as Coca Cola to glamourise wife beating.

But then again they do sell Coca Cola which makes the wife fat.

And in some countries it is morally correct to beat your wife if she is fat.

So it’s actually a slick marketing move because the wife buys Coke which makes her fat, and then the man buys Beat which makes him beat his wife. So they are basically doubling their turnover in the Coca Cola stakes, because for each Coke they sell, they sell a Beat to the husband.

Those boys at Coca Cola are such sly marketing hounds!

Sean Lloyd

Editor

6 Comments on “Coca-Cola relaunch Fresca and wife beating

  1. How do you think the energy boost from a can of Beat compares to say something like a Redbull or USN spike?

  2. Can’t say it did much! But I don’t think all this herbal stuff works anyway, I think the caffeine is the deal breaker in most drinks. Although I did have 2 Monster energy drinks last week and my head nearly spun off.

  3. Beat isn’t even on the coke website….

  4. @ Lauren — I think it’s because it won’t be around too long! Probably a mission to load it onto the website!

  5. We used to have that soda in Mexico from 2002 to 2004! and it tastes really great…. so sad that it was discontinued here :( I can’t believe that Beat is now available in South Africa!… enjoy!

  6. Yeah Fresca was discontinued here ages ago too. Shops here still import Cherry Coke and Dr Pepper so that’s alright :) I don’t know how long Beat will be here for, I don’t think it’s selling too well. For energy drinks, Red Bull is always going to win!

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