I buzzed my old ballie the other day, this was how it went down:

“Yo yo yo dad, what’s cracking with you son?”

“Not much bee-atch, and you?”

“Dad is that mom in the background?”

“Yeah”

“Where are you?”

“Cleaning up the garage”

Actually that was another story, I don’t know where I’m going with it. Well another made up story, my folks are divorced.

So anyway, I was checking the Lottery Results from this past Saturday, and call me whatever you want, but this looks spicy!

To hit you upfront with this, 18 people won the jackpot on Saturday.

That’s actually a kak screenshot, too small. Too lazy to do it again, but if you put on your super dooper vision goggles, you will see it.

EIGHTEEN!

Are you kidding me?

I think I know a few naughty lottery bosses who bought their tickets after the draw, but tricked the machine and set the date and time back. I think I know some naughty CEO’s!

Even worse though, imagine winning the lottery, because you only win it once. And all you win is like a million bucks. What do you even do with a million rand? Buy groceries? Lifetime supply of tik?

You can’t even get half a half decent apartment for that cash. I would just phone up the bottle store and get a bottle of scotch delivered. Then phone the gun store and rent a double barrell shotgun with one round. Then off myself, because there is no point in living after that.

I’m just saying, you know, I think it’s a little extraordinary that this happened. I’m suspicious. My nipples are hard, and that means I’m suspicious.

National Lottery…I’ve got my eyes on you!Watch yourself.

Sean Lloyd

Editor