I’m about to flip writing this, after standing in the queue at Tiger Tiger on Tuesday.

I knew I hadn’t organised guest list, so myself and wingman number one arrived at Tiger Tiger in Claremont at 19:45. The queue was not long at all, but clearly queue management and Tiger Tiger do not mix well. We were standing just at the end of the framing shop there, so we were not exactly far from the entrance. It took us an hour and twenty minutes to get in, I eventually stepped my blue suede shoes into Tiger Tiger at 21:05. We walked in and the dance floor was empty. Tiger Tiger was not that full.

I see what happens.

There is a vibe at Tiger Tiger on Tuesdays where they offer free drinks from 8pm until 10pm on most bottles and also the classic mixers. Obviously they keep people out for most of the time so they don’t lose too much money of the drinks.

But what happens then is that people start to lose the plot, like I did.

I walked in with a mission on Tuesday, and that was to drink more than I normally would so I could take full advantage.

Myself and Charlie V walked in, walked straight to the main bar on the left, the one near the cocktail bar and we set to work.

We stood there, ordered a double cane and cream soda each, downed it. We ordered four more, and within 15 or 20 minutes we had smashed 5 inside us. That was a good start, and after that we had 2 more within the free drinks special still. Normally we would not drink this much, but we did because they made us wait in that queue.

Fourteen drinks in under an hour between the two of us. This is what happens when you keep people in a queue for unnecessary reasons.

And seriously Tiger, control your queue. One of the other reasons we waited so long, is because people kept feeding in from the front of the queue. People coming off the escalators would just feed in from the side of the queue.

The queue never got longer at the back, but it got wider at the front.

Seriously, what are you trying to do? Organise your queue man! Thankfully there were some belters inside, that sort of made up for it.

So did the fact that Graeme Smith was there, shouting Biff at him never ceases to amuse me when I’m drunk.

Come on Tiger, sort your vibe out, I’m getting over it.

And please, have a railing that organises the queue!

EXTRA: I forgot this earlier, but it’s funny. We are chilling in the queue and a guy behind me was complaining that he had been in the queue for so long and it was going nowhere. So this portly chick behind him says

“Oh, so do you have a problem with queues hey?”

To which he replies:

“Yeah I do, just like you have a problem with your Body Mass Index”

Hectic…
Sean Lloyd

Editor