No you silly Billy. Not the actual building.

OH. MY. GOD

Did I just say silly Billy?

Do excuse me but I am busy doing some party accessories in order to get into a meaningful vibe for the party tonight.

Ambling along nicely…

I receive many e-mails from readers. Some praise me and my wittyness. Some chicks just want to smash me. Some guys want to smash me. Chicks send photos of themselves, in the hope that I will be their knight in shining armour.

I get boxes of underwear sent my way (How do you know where I live?) but most of all I get intelligent letters because my readers are intelligent. And some interesting e-mails as well.

I received a mail from G-Boy today and he had been at the Cape Town Magistrates Court to look up a will at the Masters Office. Now obviousy when looking up something as important as this you expect a neat filing system to be in place, and you expect the documents to be well taken care of and preserved as they are of importance to various people that they involve.

You should be able to walk in there and easily find the documents pertaining to you, and it should be clean and well looked after. Please enjoy this photo of the room our reader was sent to:

Tidy 

Neat 

And no, that’s not a joke. That is for real! I thought it was a joke but G-Unit assured me it was not. He even copied me in on the e-mail that he sent to Aden at CapeTalk. I will be keeping a check on it as this is not quite how the City of Cape Town should be run. Some people put a lot of work into this city, and others not so much. If this is what our legal authorities think of our documents, isn’t it time for a new system?

Better yet, a new government?

Our boys are doing an absolute sterling job of stuffing things up lately. I will keep you updated on the progress of this case.

To be honest, when I saw that mess of books and papers on the floor it reminded me of a situation I found myself in at school. I was in standard 7 at Rondebosch and had decided that Biology was just not going to cut it that day, so myself and a couple of mates walked to a buddies house just near the school.

He had told us that he found this massive porn collection in his brothers room and we should check it out. It was a better Biology lesson than photosynthesis and osmosis or whatever we did that year.

Anyway, the collection was massive. So we are chilling there when we hear the front door open. Simon goes as white as snow, I suddenly lose all urges to maintain the magnificent boner that I had, and we literally froze into stone figures. Masses of porn lying on the floor. No one was supposed to be home.

Simons old man was a lawyer and had forgotten some documents at home.

He came home at our second break. This was unheard of.

He walked in on us surrounded by about 50 porn magazines. No jokes. Ok maybe like 30 magazines.

Anyway I was expecting to be bitch slapped across the room. His old man walks in:

“Did you guys finish early today?”

“Yeah. Um the teacher was sick so we just decided to come over here” Simon said sheepishly.

“Oh cool, I see you found boets porn collection”

Silence.

“Don’t worry guys, I know he has it, nothing you aren’t going to see in your lives. See you later Si, I’m going to be working a bit late today”

Silence.

Silence followed by me nearly pissing my pants. I have never encountered such a legendary dad in my entire life! Ahhh we had some good times.

Sean Lloyd

Editor